Tuesday, 22 November 2011

Helping your child be a leader

Often I have heard that leaders are born, not made. Do you think this is true? How many times did you read a biography of a great leader, and discovered that as a child, he has been quiet, reserved and rather shy? Are those natural qualities of a leader? Of course not! These people have developed their leadership qualities later in life.

Would you like your child to be a leader?

What are the qualities of a leader? Here are some of the qualities required to be a leader, and how you can encourage the development of these qualities in your child.

Integrity - remember to be a good example, a role model for your child. Parents teach by example, and integrity is a quality kids learn from their parents. Talk with your child about integrity. One tool that is very helpful is story telling. Look for books that tell about the value of integrity.

Courage - always praise courage. When your child shows courage, notice it and praise it. Praise courage wherever you see an expression of it. Story telling is also very effective in this case.

Creative, independent thinking. In order to develop this quality, it is very helpful to ask questions. When you talk with your child about any subject at all, always ask open questions, that encourage creative thinking. Use the "One Step Farther" principle. After you have gotten all the obvious answers, ask one more question, to come up with a deeper, more creative idea. Questions like "why", "what would happen if...", "how do you think did it feel...", encourage your child to think creatively. Talk to your child, encourage independent thinking.

In addition, it is also important to listen to your child. When your child has a creative, unusual suggestion, never negate it or laugh at it. Always treat your child's ideas with respect.

Confidence - this is one of the most important qualities required for success in general. To develop confidence in your child, avoid criticizing your child, praise your child sincerely and often, develop a habit to talk about your child's strengths and achievements with him every day. Remember to make it a point to bring up at least one good quality of your child every day. If you adopt it as a routine, over time it will do wonders for your child. It takes only a few minutes to mention an achievement or a strength (a good quality). Encourage your child, repeat the phrase "you can do it" often.

A leader takes responsibility. When something goes wrong, sometimes it makes us feel better if we can blame something else or someone else. A leader takes responsibility. Make sure your child knows that he is the "boss" in his life. His success is his responsibility. We are not victims of our environment, we have control over our life. Teach your child to "come from a place of power". When your child blames someone else or something else for a mishap, or comes up with excuses, you have an opportunity to encourage your child to assume responsibility. Make sure that your child knows that it is Ok to make mistakes. Mistakes are an opportunity to learn. You can help your child draw conclusions, without "making him wrong", by asking: "what did you learn from this?", "what do you think went wrong?", "why do you think this happened?", "how could you avoid this?" and again "what do you think would happen if...?". Your child should understand that he has no control over other people, and is not expected to have control over other people's actions, but he has full control over his own reaction. This will give your child the feeling of power, as opposed to "being a victim".

The conversations that you hold with your child have a profound effect on your child's future. Make sure you take the time to talk with your child every day, to be involved with what is happening in your child's life. To support, encourage and inspire. By doing that, you are being a leader, and you are developing your child's leadership skills.


Lead, dont follow

Most people in life are happy to follow the lead of other people, to sit on the fence in a debate or have the attitude of hiding at the back of the class. The most successful people are leaders and make things happen for themselves by taking a positive attitude and through working very hard to reach their goals. We are all able to become leaders and this article may help you to achieve this status.

I grew up as a very nervous person, who had very little self-confidence and who was very shy. I was not happy being this way and often felt jealous of other people who were happy to speak up and take control of tasks and situations. I wanted to be one of these leaders and not the follower that I certainly had become.

In my early twenties, I decided that the time had arrived to make a series of life changing decisions. I was determined to have a happy and successful life and was aware that I needed to change my whole attitude and approach to life.

I was not happy at where I worked and joined an employment agency in an attempt to find alternative employment. In the reception area of the agency, I started speaking to a man who was also their hoping to find a different job. His name was Mark and we got on well and wished each other the best of luck in our quest to find work. We even exchanged phone numbers and vowed to keep each other up to date with our progress. leadership quotesI was then interviewed by a man who explained his plan to help me to find this new role of work. He was very bright, clever and positive and had many interesting ideas. He seemed very confident that I would soon be employed for a different company more suited to the skills which I had.

At one stage of the meeting he described the scenario of a group interview. He suggested that we may be ushered into a large room with a big table. As we sat down there would be a sheet of paper asking the group to debate a particular subject. He stated that all of the people in the room would be in the same position, all looking for work, all nervous, however that in that room I could be whoever I wanted to be. He said that I needed to stand up and take the lead by stating that I would act as chairman and that if anyone had a comment that they wanted to make, that they could raise their hand. If I did this I would show my prospective employer that I was a leader.

I went home and thought about this and did not believe I had it in me to act in the way that he wanted me to, as I was not a leader. Later that evening Mark phoned and all he was talking about was the group interview scenario. He also stated that there was no way that he would be able to stand up either in the way that had been described.

I did not have to ever attend a group interview, but Mark did. He surprised himself by carrying out the advice and stated that after he had said his initial statement about being the chairman, that he had never felt so powerful and in control. For the rest of the day other members of the group had been regularly asking him questions as if he was some sort of team leader. He was very proud of himself and I am happy to report that he was successful at that interview and is very happy in his new position.

He has also taken the success and learning experience into his social life and states that he has never had a higher self-esteem. I am very pleased for him as he is a genuine person who works very hard. He is also one of only a few friends that I can honestly say that I trust.

I have taken inspiration from Mark and have entered into a career of helping people who stutter, to achieve fluency. This is something which I really enjoy and which gives me a large amount of job satisfaction. I am also far more confident than I ever have been and have at last found happiness.

In conclusion we all have it in us to be a leader. We need to be brave and determined to take control and remember that all we can do in life is to try our best. We are only sure about living one life, so lets be happy and not accept second best. Be a leader in life, not a follower. stay motivated

Tips to succeeding as a leader

An important part of success in life is the ability to lead. It is important that we not only be able to lead others but be willing to lead ourselves. No one succeeds in life by simply following others. Sometimes we simply must strike a bold new path for ourselves.

Being a good leader is more than simply being at the forefront of the crowd. A leader must act. Too often in America, we simply accept that someone looks or sounds like a leader and too rarely do we actually look at the actions that leader performs -- and that is the true test of leadership.

However, in order to become good leaders ourselves, we need to concentrate on actions rather than simple appearances. The title of this article refers to eight steps, but do not think of these as progressive steps like so many recipes or instruction manuals describe. Instead, think of these as actions that you must take on a regular basis.

First, be alert to new potentials. "Reality" is not absolute but rather subject to constant change. Think about inventors, explorers, and agents of social change who have achieved greatness. Some might simply say that certain people are successful because they are lucky to be in the right place at the right time. Maybe so, but if they hadn't had their eyes open for the opportunity, then it wouldn't have mattered if they were in the right place.

Second, accept inspiration from wherever it comes; even your opponents. The wisest leaders constantly study their competition. In war, politics, and business we constantly see examples of this research and reconnaissance. Too many times though a certain study, many concentrate on finding a weakness to exploit. If you want to a be a leader of positive change don't fall victim to this trend. Instead, if you find a weakness, make sure to avoid that pitfall yourself. If you find the strength then find a way to strengthen your own qualities to match.

Third, learn something new and promote in new ways every day. This means you must continually seek to expand your horizons, internally and externally. Feed your mind with new lessons and knowledge, but constantly expand your social horizons as well. Seek out and meet new people and immerse yourself in new social situations. You never know when these new experiences will help you in your leadership role.

Fourth, search for and find answers in subtle clues. Look beneath the surface and constantly question. This is an extension of the third step in that you are seeking new knowledge. But this also means that you will need to step off the traditional paths of knowledge. Don't simply read books in the literary canon or the bestsellers list. Take seminars rather than classes as there is more room for questioning and debate. Seek out the unconventional thinkers, teachers, and writers. leadership quotes
Fifth, improvise if no existing solutions are available. No excuses. Necessity is the mother of invention. How do you know it won't work if you've never tried it before? Remember, not all approaches need to come from the front. Look at your problem from all sides and systematically attempt different solutions in various combinations.

Six, make at least one person you care about happy every day. If you make it a point to be thoughtful and caring for one person every day then soon this thoughtful, caring behavior will become a habit and that habit will spread to the others around you. Making someone else happy also feeds your own personal happiness. Just imagine how much better the world would be if we all did a little bit more to spread happiness.

Seven, offer help, even if there's no apparent advantage to you. This means more than writing a check. It means giving of your time and energy and yourself. Sometimes it will mean helping someone you don't know and sometimes it can be a very personal action.

Finally, never let negativity be your last word on the subject. If your final words are negative than no matter how hopeful you may be about the potential of a project or action the lasting impression you give to others is one of negativity. Accentuate the positive and you are more likely to see a positive outcome.

If you follow these eight action steps not only you will be a better leader but also lead yourself to a more successful life.